Tag: People

Book Summary: How To Win Friends And Influence People-p4

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Part Three – How To Win People To Your Way Of Thinking

  1. You Can’t Win An Argument
    1. When you have heard your opponents out, dwell first on the points and areas on which you agree.
    2. Be honest, Look for areas where you can admit error and say so.
    3. Apologize for your mistakes. It will help disarm your opponents and reduce defensiveness.
    4. Your opponents may be right.

Principle 1 – The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.

  1. A Sure Way Of Making Enemies -And How To Avoid It
    1. Galileo said: You cannot teach a man anything; you can only help him to find it within himself.
    2. As Lord Chesterfield said to his son: Be wiser than other people if you can; but do not tell them so.
    3. Socrates: One thing only I know, and that is that I know nothing.
  2. You will never get into trouble by admitting that you may be wrong.
  3. I have found it of enormous value when I can permit myself to understand the other person.
  • Principle 2 – Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never say, “You’re wrong.”
  1. If You’re Wrong, Admit It

“By fighting you never get enough, but by yielding you get more than you expected.”

  • Principle 3 – If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
  1. A Drop Of Honey
  2. The friendly approach and appreciation can make people change their minds more readily than all the bluster and storming in the world.
  3. Lincoln said: “A drop of honey catches more flies than a gallon of gall.”
  • Principle 4 – Begin in a friendly way.
  1. The Secret Of Socrates
  2. In talking with people, don’t begin by discussing the things on which you differ.
  3. Get the other person saying “Yes, yes” at the outset.
  4. Chinese proverb: “He who treads softly goes far.”
  • Principle 5 – Get the other person saying “yes, yes” immediately.

6 – The Safety Valve In Handling Complaints

La Rochefoucauld, the French philosopher, said: “If you want enemies, excel your friends; but if you want friends, let your friends excel you.”

  • Principle 6– Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.

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Book Summary: How To Win Friends And Influence People-p3

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Part Two – Ways To Make People Like You

  1. Do This And You’ll Be Welcome Anywhere
  • Principle 1 Become genuinely interested in other people.

2 – A Simple Way To Make A Good First Impression

Professor James V. McConnell, a psychologist at the University of Michigan, expressed his feelings about a smile. “People who smile,” he said, “tend to manage teach and sell more effectively, and to raise happier children. There’s far more information in a smile than a frown. That’s why encouragement is a much more effective teaching device than punishment.”

William James: “Action seems to follow feeling, but really action and feeling go

together; and by regulating the action, which is under the more direct control of the will, we can indirectly regulate the feeling, which is not. Thus the sovereign voluntary path to cheerfulness, if our cheerfulness be lost, is to sit up cheerfully and to act and speak as if cheerfulness were already there. …”

“There is nothing either good or bad,” said Shakespeare, “but thinking makes it so.”

  • Principle 2 – Smile.

3 – If You Don’t Do This, You Are Headed For Trouble

  • Principle 3 – Remember that a person’s name is to that person the

sweetest and most important sound in any language.

4 – An Easy Way To Become A Good Conversationalist

Listening is just as important in one’s home life as in the world of business.

  • Principle 4 – Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.

5 – How To Interest People

  • Principle 5 – Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.

6 – How To Make People Like You Instantly

Always make the other person feel important.

William James said: “The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be

appreciated.”

“Do unto others as you would have others do unto you.”

The life of many a person could probably be changed if only someone would make him feel important.

“Talk to people about themselves and they will listen for hours .”

  • Principle 6 – Make the other person feel important-and do it sincerely.

In a Nutshell – Six Ways To Make People Like You

  • Principle 1 – Become genuinely interested in other people.
  • Principle 2 – Smile.
  • Principle 3 – Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
  • Principle 4 – Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
  • Principle 5 – Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.
  • Principle 6 – Make the other person feel important-and do it sincerely.

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Book Summary: How To Win Friends And Influence People-p2

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Part 1 – Fundamental Techniques In Handling People

1 – “If You Want to Gather Honey, Don’t Kick Over the Beehive”

Hans Selye, a great psychologist, said, “As much as we thirst for approval, we dread condemnation.”

“A great man shows his greatness,” said Carlyle, “by the way he treats little men.”

  • Principle 1 – Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.

2 – The Big Secret of Dealing with People

Some of the things most people want include:

  1. Health and the preservation of life. 2. Food. 3. Sleep. 4. Money and the things money will buy. 5. Life in the hereafter. 6. Sexual gratification. 7. The well-being of our children. 8. A feeling of importance.
  • Principle 2 – Give honest and sincere appreciation.

3 – “He Who Can Do This Has the Whole World with Him. He Who

Cannot, Walks a Lonely Way”

William Winter once remarked that “self-expression is the dominant necessity of human nature.”

“First, arouse in the other person an eager want. He who can do this has the whole world with him. He who cannot walks a lonely way.”

  • Principle 3 – Arouse in the other person an eager want.

In a Nutshell Fundamental Techniques In Handling People

  • Principle 1 Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.
  • Principle 2 Give honest and sincere appreciation.
  • Principle 3 Arouse in the other person an eager want.

“Education,” said Dr. John G. Hibben, former president of Princeton

University, “is the ability to meet life’s situations,”

Only knowledge that is used sticks in your mind.

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Book Summary: How To Win Friends And Influence People-p1

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How To Win Friends And Influence People

How To Win Friends And Influence People By Dale Carnegie

Eight Things This Book Will Help You Achieve:

1. Get out of a mental rut, think new thoughts, acquire new visions, discover new ambitions.

2. Make friends quickly and easily.

3. Increase your popularity.

4. Win people to your way of thinking.

5. Increase your influence, your prestige, your ability to get things done.

6. Handle complaints, avoid arguments, keep your human contacts smooth and pleasant.

7. Become a better speaker, a more entertaining conversationalist.

8. Arouse enthusiasm among your associates.

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